“You have poor rapport with children. You only teach because you want to be liked.”
The shock of these statements caused amygdala hijack — it had impaired my prefrontal cortex. My tears and complete confusion led me to blurt, “I want to be liked,” confirming the Principal’s erroneous assumptions. What I had wanted to say is that children learn better when they like the teacher.
It took a new work environment where I was embraced by the team, and three years of processing before my very negative experience was behind me. But the lessons I took from it remain. Leadership matters.
If we want the best from our educators and team members, supporting a fear-based environment is counterproductive. But how do we create a Montessori culture amongst adults?
“An education capable of saving humanity is no small undertaking; it involves the spiritual development of man, the enhancement of his value as an individual, and the preparation of young people to understand the times in which they live.”
— Maria Montessori, Education and Peace
I write not as expert, but as co-traveller on the journey of education. Who knows where your life may take you and the roles you may find yourself in? Leadership can be learned.
Leadership has always fascinated me. In 1991 I took a course in Christian Leadership through my church, and I think those early seeds have remained part of my reflections ever since. Combining these seeds with another truth I learned in my secondary teaching training: “The way the principal of a school treats the teachers will flow into how the teachers treat the children.” So leading well is actually important for the children — and not just the adults.
How Do We Lead Adults?
In recent years I have spasmodically attempted to educate myself regarding evidenced theories of leadership. I have repeatedly and consistently been astounded by the congruence between the practices of the leaders in the world’s most successful companies and the philosophy of Montessori.
As I’ve studied business leadership here are some quotes I’ve come across:
“Don’t mark my paper, help me get an A.”
Alfie Kohn has published and spoken of the lesser outcomes that occur from grades and homework. In Montessori, we assess by observation and scaffold for next steps. This is the real-world approach of best-practice companies for their adult teams.
“An organisation suffused with fear is inherently incapable of genuine creativity and innovation. Its people are condemned to daily lives of intense stress, unhappiness, ill health and dysfunctional families. Conscious leaders seek to drive fear out of their organisations.”
The ever-present understanding in the workplace is that an unspoken threat exists — work well or get the sack. Bosses manage people through termination-potential performance moments. The consequence of not meeting the targets is unemployment; not paying the rent, not putting food on the table. It is the ultimate in punishment-driven models, regardless of how it is packaged. People work in fear.
In Montessori, we don’t utilise punishments and manipulations of fear to achieve adult-determined outcomes. Instead, we foster agency and responsibility in children in an environment where they know they are respected.
“The success of a leader is best gauged by what happens after they are gone. Does the organisation continue to operate with high principles and moral clarity?”
The Montessori teacher measures her success by the children working as if she doesn’t exist. Yes?
“When a leader gets the environment right, the normal human response is trust and cooperation.”
Prepared environment?
“We are going to extend trust and people will thrive. People want to be trusted. It’s the most compelling form of human motivation.”
Trust cannot be commanded. Trust is earned. But it is hard to trust in an environment of fear. The structures in which we organise, coach, build capacity and lead our teams are ones built on a structure of fear. If I said to you, “Come into my office for a chat about your performance” — would you feel happy? Or has the word ‘performance’ evolved into a word that creates dread?
We can’t escape the word. It’s the terminology from the Fair Work site. Every document regarding concerns with an employee’s performance issues must contain the phrase, “Could lead to dismissal,” or an unfair dismissal case would succeed against you. Somehow, in the midst of this, it is essential that we set a different tone.
How Is Leadership in Our Sector Looking?
Ensuring we have wonderful Montessori educators in our schools and services is the number one priority to remain true to our mission. You cannot run a Montessori school or centre with play-based educators, Reggio staff, or chalk-and-talk from the front. Recruiting, training and then retaining Montessorians is a foundational aspect of the success of our school, centre — and even the sector as a whole.
How can we grow our numbers of capable educators? First of all, let’s stop the dropout. Culture Amp conducted workplace surveys to assess the reasons people leave, and the reasons people stay. The results are striking:
This is irrespective of all other factors including pay. If a good leader ensures good management and development opportunities, that becomes 92% of the circumstances that provide inducement to leave — addressed.
Simply put, if we want best practice, we require the best workforce. To achieve the best workforce we require the best leadership. Leaders are the CEOs, the Approved Providers and the Principals. Leaders are also the Centre Managers and Educational Leaders. Leaders are also the Room Lead or Group Leaders. I would go so far as to say that leaders are also the room assistants who mentor a new trainee.
Ensuring great leadership is not just a nice idea. It is an essential part of ensuring a sustainable, viable and vibrant Montessori sector. Leadership is a relationship — a delicate dance of communication and care.
Three Key Concepts
I’d like to walk you through three ideas drawn from world-class leadership thinking — and how naturally each one maps to the Montessori philosophy you already know and practise.
Principle One
Normalisation and Deviations — with Four Corners (Henry Cloud)
A child’s journey through life on a path that allows for development to progress and flourish may be interrupted by obstacles. This will deviate the path and will look like the child creating defences — oppositional defiance, timidity, being loud, being funny or charming, crying to get their own way, or even being very good. As Montessorians we recognise these as deviations.
As we grow up, these deviations don’t disappear. Many folk may recall the violent altercations that occurred in supermarkets during the COVID crisis — normally regulated adults, in a state of fear, abandoning the norms of civil behaviour. Deviations in adulthood affect relationships in the workplace: group dynamics, inclusion, awareness of others, and conflict management can all be adversely impacted. We all know that BELONGING is a key human tendency — our framework, the EYLF, declares this in the very first word.
The Four Corners of Connection by Henry Cloud identifies four types of connection — or belonging — in workplaces. The goal is to move everyone toward Real Connection:
- —No Connection — Alone. Disconnected, not listened to or supported. Motivation and engagement decrease; wins and losses aren’t shared; competitiveness is up and co-operation is down.
- —Bad Connection — Not Good Enough. Feeling inferior, flawed, judged. Diminishes performance, creativity and thinking. May try hard to gain approval, but after a time becomes defeated, resentful and disengaged.
- —Fake Good Connection. Connecting with people who flatter them and agree with them. Creating unhealthy alliances. Self-medicating in various ways. This good feeling is shallow — like a sugar high.
- —Real Connection. Honest and vulnerable. Gets help, increases learning, celebrates wins. Accountability that makes them feel valued. Hearts, minds and souls thrive; energy is up; collaboration is high; outcomes are better.
The solutions are practical: pull in those who are disengaged and ask what caused it. Help people become connected and feel part of the whole. Balance criticism and encouragement. Reflect honestly — What might I be doing to contribute to a culture of fear? Create a culture of learning, not perfection.
- →Who in your work environment might be disconnected? Cleaners? Cooks? Admin? Float educators? How can you help?
- →Are you in a non-connected category yourself? What should you do?
- →Leaders — wake up every day asking, “Where are we today?” How do you assess connection in your workplace and progress toward Real Connection?
Principle Two
Sensitive Periods and “Flow” — with Situational Leadership (Hersey–Blanchard)
We understand that children develop concentration through having access to activity that meets their sensitive period. This state of complete engagement has been linked with the term ‘flow’ from the work of Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. Flow occurs when skill levels are high, but the challenge level is also high — a person is challenged by the task, but capable of achieving the result.
Just like children in their sensitive periods with apparatus that is right for their urge to learn. For instance, I have studied piano, and in the future I might decide to learn a new piece. It might take some practice (especially as I’m rusty!), but I’m likely to find myself engrossed in the process and achieve a state of flow. If, however, I was asked to draft a design for a new bridge over the Brisbane River — I would have low skill, high challenge. Anxiety-provoking indeed.
As adults become adept at their work, the challenge of learning new things reduces, which can have the employee move from ‘flow’ to ‘boredom’. This may affect their apparent attitude. I consider this a type of adult ‘false fatigue’ — because if the employee can be re-engaged, they often become a long-term valued member of the team. This is not unrelated to why 52% of people in the Culture Amp survey cited lack of development opportunities as their reason for leaving.
The work of Paul Hersey and Ken Blanchard in Situational Leadership overlays naturally here. Situational Leaders don’t have a one-size-fits-all approach — they adjust to where each person is:
- —Directing (S1) — Unable and Unwilling. Like an initial presentation. Simple instructions, clear explanations, careful supervision. The leader defines responsibilities and ensures foundational skills are built.
- —Coaching (S2) — Unable but Willing. Like a re-direct or later presentation. Provides both direction and personal support. Followers are still developing skills but are motivated — leaders maintain that self-confidence while building capability.
- —Supporting (S3) — Able but Unwilling. Like a site supervisor checking work in stages. The follower has the skills; the leader focuses on feedback and motivation to encourage greater development.
- —Delegating (S4) — Able and Willing. Like the 3rd year of a Montessori cycle. The follower is capable and confident. The leader provides support when needed but offers full autonomy over their responsibilities.
Situational Leaders don’t say, “It’s in the manual — I shouldn’t have to explain it.” Nor do they say, “I don’t care how long you have been in the role, I will continue to direct and guide you myself.” They read the person, not just the position.
Principle Three
Trusting the Child and Friendliness with Error — with the 1st Dysfunction of a Team (Lencioni)
To implement effective leadership, understanding your team and having trust in the relationship is essential. In Montessori, we have ‘friendliness with error’. Our apparatus have in-built self-correction, and mistakes are opportunities to learn. Children are free to make errors — without judgement or reprimand. This trust is the opposite of control.
“Trust is the confidence among team members that their peers’ intentions are good, and that there is no reason to be protective or careful around the group. Teammates are vulnerable with one another and confident that their respective vulnerabilities will not be used against them.”
— Patrick Lencioni, The Five Dysfunctions of a Team
Build trust among team members so that people feel free to admit what they don’t know, make mistakes, ask for help, apologise when necessary, and speak freely. In an environment where errors can cost your job, making people feel safe and able to be vulnerable is genuinely hard — but trust is foundational to a cohesive team.
Observation — When Talking About Adults?
“An observer obviously needs something to observe and he must be trained in order to be able to see and recognise objective truth; he must also have at his disposal children placed in such an environment that they can manifest their natural traits.”
— Maria Montessori, The Discovery of the Child, p. 48
Observing adults can include classroom visits, documentation audits, and colleague reports. But ultimately, the best way to foster trust and place a colleague in an environment where they can manifest their natural traits is genuine conversation. A relaxed, holistic ‘cuppa’ style conversation is a strategy used by many companies seeking deep engagement.
- →What is the level of trust I share with my relationships, my team, my stakeholders?
- →What is my truest intent? Is it truly to serve others — or to serve myself?
- →What are some ways in which I can deliberately demonstrate my intent to serve through my behaviours?
“A different shaped jigsaw piece for every single player. The blanket system is not the way to manage a team — knowing the players individually.”
— Rio Ferdinand
To know your ‘players’ individually, one must strategically come to know each one. This comes back to the adult version of Montessori observation. Observation through conversation.
These concepts are drawn from the leadership style known as ‘servant leadership’ — or as I prefer, ‘scaffolding leadership’. Servant Leaders, or Level 5 leaders as described in Good to Great by Jim Collins, have qualities we should aspire to.
Ensuring great leadership is not just a nice idea. It is an essential part of ensuring a sustainable, viable and vibrant Montessori sector. Let’s grow Montessori in Australia.
Vicki McKinnon has been involved in early childhood education for over 30 years. Originally trained as a secondary Music and English teacher, she moved into early childhood in 1994 when her parents opened their first centre in Inala, Queensland. After discovering the Montessori method and completing her Montessori training under Mrs Willemien Duyker-de Vries, who was herself mentored by Dr Maria Montessori, Vicki has worked with deep conviction to embed Montessori philosophy and practice across her services and the wider sector.
Vicki holds a Bachelor of Music (Education), Graduate Diploma of Education (Early Childhood), Diploma of Montessori Education, Diploma of Business, and Certificate IV in Training & Assessment. She is a graduate of the Australian Owner Manager Program and serves on the Board of Montessori Australia.
- Collins, J. (2020). Good to Great. Penguin Audio.
- Blanchard, K. & Broadwell, R. (2018). Servant Leadership in Action. Berrett-Koehler Publishers.
- Lencioni, P. (2002). The Five Dysfunctions of a Team. Random House Audio.
- Bartlett, S. (2023). The Diary of a CEO. Penguin Audio.
- Culture Amp. The Biggest Lie: People Quit Bosses. cultureamp.com
